Give to Gain What Women Know About Reciprocity, Power and Purpose

A serene woman with closed eyes is surrounded by lush, delicate pink and light blue flowers that entwine her hair and shoulders, set against a soft teal background, radiating the quiet power of women in a dreamy, ethereal atmosphere with sculptural grace.

This International Women’s Day theme is Give to Gain. I have to say, when I first read this, I was somewhat disappointed.  I have seen many women clients who have been burnt out from giving too much and not gaining anything but emotional exhaustion. I also reflected on the positive work that some clients have done to set boundaries so that they receive rather than always taking the role of the giver. However, this theme of ‘Give to Gain’ invites us to rethink what giving really means and what women gain when giving is conscious, reciprocal and rooted in self-worth rather than obligation.

The words “reciprocal” and “rooted in self-worth” were the ones I needed to hear for this to become a more meaningful proposition. Do you feel the same? For generations, women have been recognised as, or expected to be, givers of time, care, emotional support, and resilience. Yet too often, this giving has been framed as obligation rather than strength, expectation rather than investment. If we are going to, as women, move into a place where we can feel empowered, we need to link arms with those of us who have found it harder for many reasons.

The Difference Between Giving and Over-Giving

There is a crucial difference between giving from a place of choice and a fully nurtured self, and giving from a place of expectation and exhaustion. Giving becomes transformative when it is chosen, not demanded. Women who give wisely gain confidence, influence, connection, meaning and self-respect. Women who over-give often lose themselves in the process.

What Women Gain When Giving Is Intentional

Intentional giving creates agency; the ability to decide where energy goes and what truly matters. This kind of giving builds rather than drains. Many women describe the moment they stopped giving automatically and started giving deliberately as a turning point.  

Intentional Giving Is Not People Pleasing. It Is Influence

A woman in a deep purple, glittering hooded cloak blows sparkly purple dust from her hands. Her eyes are closed, and she wears dramatic purple eye makeup. The dark, blurred background enhances the mysterious aura of women and their hidden purpose.

Emotional intelligence,empathy and collaboration have long been undervalued, yet they sustain families, workplaces and societies. When women give their voice and leadership, they don’t lose authority; they create it. When women come together, there seem to be many instances where just by giving to each other, we gain so much collectively, but also as individuals. I see this in the generosity of sharing in the editors who have come together to make Elysium Lifestyle Magazine a place of abundant sharing and wisdom. There is a sense that by giving time, knowledge and enthusiasm, there is a collective power of enrichment that grows us all. Women have always understood something the world is only just beginning to catch up with: giving and gaining are not opposites.

The Courage to Give to Yourself

As often said, ‘you can’t pour from an empty cup’, it is important to give to yourself first. Giving yourself rest, boundaries, ambition, pleasure and honesty is not selfish; it is foundational. Healthy giving exists within reciprocity. When women expect balance, they raise the standard for everyone. As we move through life stages, giving evolves from effort to wisdom to legacy. None of this is a loss; it is a transfer of power. I personally feel that I feel as I have got older, less competitive and more collaborative, a willingness to mentor and coach and a desire to see all females feel capable of achieving their goals. By metaphorically taking the hand of another woman, we can reinforce the dreams and desires of us all, by taking a dream and making it a reality.

A Final Reflection

This International Women’s Day is about honouring what women gain when their giving is respected, recognised and reciprocated. Let’s look for places where we can unite and collaborate, where we can lead and inspire and lastly where we can spread love and diffuse hate.

Two ethereal women’s faces, eyes closed, gently touch in reciprocity. The left is shaded in blue and purple; the right glows peach and orange. Wispy, smoky lines swirl around them, blending their features in a dreamlike, surreal style.

Happy International Women’s Day to you all!

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